With the release of the new Jennifer Lawrence film, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 we thought we would show you how to survive the real life version of The Hunger Games, it is of course, Fresher’s week.
If you think it would be easy to survive a game where you have to kill each other in order to win then you have obviously never been to university and had to deal with fresher’s week. Never mind the proverbial rat race.
So here are our top tips to survive fresher’s week like it was The Hunger Games.
- Make Friends
Fresher’s week can be a scary time and it is understandable everything is new; you’re going though everything that a competitor for The Hunger Games would go through (Besides the possibility of death). That’s why it is important to make as many friends as possible during fresher’s week, building rapport with other students is vital for your survival as no one wants to go to £1 shot night in Velocity night club alone, so you’ll need friends to call upon in order to have a mega binge night.
2. Eat Right
The Hunger Games gives you an idea of what you will be up against at Uni with tuition fees going through the roof and that is hunger itself.
Okay so it will be tempting to have takeaways and vodka red bulls throughout Freshers’ week, however, you must fight the urge as constant drinking and eating a donna kebab will make you an easy target for people to kill you and make your wallet lighter than it should be.
If the Hunger Games have taught us anything apart from Jennifer Lawrence and Natalie Dormer being fit trouts, is that preparation is everything. Failure to prepare, prepare to fail and a can of baked beans can last you for days on end whilst never going out of date.
3. Train effectively
Okay so we lied, our version of Hunger Games in freshers’ week also includes drinking and this is no place for light weights, or you’ll be lucky if you make it to Wednesday and if that’s the case it’s game over.
Train effectively before hand to really get your drinking skills as best as they can. It’s a marathon not a sprint, but just remember the fat fucks never win so exercise whilst drinking is the perfect combination.
4. Failing to Prepare, is Preparing to Fail
In the Hunger Games there is 12 districts and it is likely that during freshers’ week you will join a student university society which will be one of many on offer. Choose your society wisely for you don’t want to be in a shit society that has few members or you will have a small amount of allies to rely upon when times get tough.
Find out all the main information about the society and the most important stuff like boy to girl/trout ratios, parties and how many members they have. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, it’s better to know what you are up against when trying to obtain the coveted golden trout.
5. Do Not Get Emotional with Someone
In Hunger Games, Katniss’ name comes from the aquatic plant known for its edible and healthy root, but don’t acquire a taste for a certain trout at University for you could end up heart broken, if like in the film they meet a bitter end.
Freshers’ week is all about you and that means you have to be selfish by doing what you need to survive. No trout should be relied upon for you have no idea who or what they might do next.
6. Avoid Abandoning Your Squad
You may have the urge to just go off and do your own thing, but that is the worst thing you can do. Safety is in numbers. It’s much easier if a group of lads joins a group of trout than just you trying to take on a load of these slippery creatures single handedly.
7. Learn How to Treat Disease
You’re going to have to get to terms with the fact you may get a STD during Freshers Week if you do not prepare yourself for every eventuality, so know where the nearest clinic is and have that number to hand. Try and avoid trying to diagnose yourself via google as you’ll end up with your head falling off.
8. Wear Protection
Even Jennifer Lawrence has to wear armour! So make sure you wrap your weapon up to avoid all nasty surprises. the last thing you need is having an awkward conversation with a trout you banged in a nightclub toilet after a shot of Sambuca.
Winning is everything so make sure you survive the Freshers’ Week Hunger Games.